I was wearing the care in the community ensemble: track bottoms with soapbar holes; the scruffy cardigan for old people; the awful plasticy jacket for the distressed but still aspiring bourgeois; when I walked into the shop in Princes Street to look for a leather jacket. It's Monday so there's nobody there but me and Antonio Banderas and Andy Garcia. The jacket costs £375, but the joes lets it go for £200 cash. I never buy myself anything but underwear and socks.
It'll last me twenty years, until I am dead. That's ten pounds a year or under a pound a month, maybe three or four pence a day. Once I've got a face transplant and a new set of zoobies, I'll be able to go out and chase girls.
9 comments:
Spiffy jacket, just take good care of it and it will last even longer.
I don't think the face transplant is the problem, could be the attitude. *grin*
You got a good deal on it as well.
Funny to wear cows rather than eat them. Personally I'll stick to eating them.
I say!
I hope you realise that 'zoobie' is Arabic slang for a man's tinkly-tinkler (as Menzies IV used to call it).
MM III
Doc Bob says the new jacket as a present to yourself is a sign of self-nurturing investment and a farewell to addictive expenditures. He's trying to get Albert off buying gizmos, a distraction from the main game.
The edited version of Clockwork Orange had the zoobies excised.
PS another advantage of leather jackets is they can stretch over time. The gift that keeps on giving.
Albert? It's all I've got out of retirement apart from having no jobbie to go to! Hotboy
I say!
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MM III
Mingers. Good idea, cut out the middle man.
Albert and Mingin'! Sometimes my real name appears and it has to go! Hotboy
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