Samye Monday!

Monday 3:02 p.m.
                            The penny dropped yesterday as to how I managed to get into a fankle with the lama last summer. I was going to get into sitting in the hut big time over my summer holidays and I went to see him courtesy of the old, toothless one, and he told me to stop meditating on the drops and channels and whatnot, indicating that I would go bonkers and possibly explode. Or ...
                            Reading a really good book called the Life of Gampopa by a joe called Mackenzie Stewart. He was going on about the Dorje Sempa (with is the 100,000s of prostrations and whatnot) and how after that your lama might give you another empowerment. That's the one that should allow you to do what I was wanting to do last summer.
                            Shume mistake! I assumed the empowerments I got off his big brother were sufficient, but this is not the case, it seems. So I was jumping the gun big style. Something horrible might have happened if I hadn't spoken to him, so fair play to the old, toothless one for driving me down there.
                            In the book I've been reading, there's a brilliant chapter on what happens to Gampopa when he is practising the inner heat juju. He has problems!! He goes to see Milarepa who tells him what to do, but he really does have problems. At one point he falls into black despair and that's just a side effect.
                             It's comical really. I'm stumblebumming around in this vajrayana juju and almost always getting the wrong end of the stick. One thing's for sure: I'm a million miles away from getting anywhere near this inner heat juju. A noble aspiration, I'd say.
                             But the meditations down here are going superbly. I've been sitting on the pebbles by the raging river a couple of afternoons in a row and that's been particularly good. Unexpectedly good for that time in the afternoon. Unfortunately, it's raining just now so I'll go and sit in the temple again!!