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Thursday 24 February 2011

What works?






Thursay 10:30 a.m.
                            Prostrations as a physical exercise are a bit so-so, and I can only concentrate on the number done, but they are really supposed to be as much spiritual as physical, I assume. You're supposed to be prostrating to someone. Someone alive. In the juju, I think you're supposed to prostrate to your root guru, and imagine him as a buddha, and that's how the juju is supposed to work.
                            I was prostrating the Lama Yeshe at the Samye Ling, not just prostrating. And I'm trying to keep that up although I can still just keep the count in mind.
                            A guy called Dave Gibson assured me that taking refuge would improve my meditations, and it did. The empowerments seemed to help as well. And whatever I was doing at the Samye Ling last week has really helped. The meditations now are on a different level, the first one of the day there was just fantastic with a lot of bliss, light and some warmth. They really are working now and I think this must have something to do with my attitude changing a little.
                            I'm not interested in what's true and what's not. The Karma Kagyu juju joes say they have the skillful means and that this has worked for people in Tibet for a thousand years, and I believe them. It's getting your head into the position so that it'll work that concerns me because essentially I'm a pragmatist.
                           I smoked from Thursday to Sunday and then took the nicotine withdrawals to work. A perfect storm. I don't normally feel scunnered, but I did, and now I don't.
                           I'm  a bit desperate to get on with these meditations and I'm going to avoid trying to be normal again. I don't really want to be too sociable. I want to be happy in an empty room.
                           Some of the photies are of the empty room I was happy in last week from about nine till lunchtime; the middle section of the temple at the Samye Ling. There's also a photie of the stupa through my bedroom window.
                          I will be back, Jack! I will be back!!

5 comments:

Marie Rex said...

An empty room is a wonderful place. I think you work too hard trying for an ideal rather than accept who you are and do the best you can with it.

Hotboy said...

Marie! You are dead right there! It's always been like that with everything with me. Hotboy

Hotboy said...

Marie! Aren't the floors in the temple gorgeous? No shoes ever walk over it. I'm dead impressed by folk who can make floors like that and suchlike. Hotboy

rob said...

Yes you've always worked too hard at things.

Hotboy said...

Albert? I've always worked really hard at enjoying myself. Really knackers you that! Hotboy