Saturday 9:40 p.m.
I feel quite settled with my life of going backwards and forwards between here and Lanarkshire now. Or, I was this time. Everything has been going so well that I knew the meditations should be stunning by Thursday and so they were. I'm starting to make it feel like a retreat, sort of. Since I was sitting at the table mostly, I kept my eyes closed and concentrated on the bliss.
Voidness. I'm getting into voidness. Emptiness is form. Form is emptiness. As soon as I started getting anywhere with the heat, and bliss seemed to be developing wonderfully, I got the Dalai Lama book on the Mahamudra and switched to voidness. I was foolishly concentrating on the heat raising stuff because the voidness seemed a bit far away, but the exercises seem to be working.
There's no wee person inside you mind operating you, Jack. Your ears just hear things and your eyes just see things. You become conscious and it's all more or less there. Who's deciding to roll the joints then, Hotboy? I think that's me, Jack. But this is a work in progress. At least, there seems to be some progress.
So I'm trying to start by establishing voidness. The bliss will be there practically right away, but it will change in the course of the meditation with the various levels of increase and diminution. So you've got the bliss and you go for the voidness and try to arise as the Medicine Buddha and do the juju on top of all that. I'm still doing much the same things, but it's changed a bit. It's got a bit better again over the last couple of weeks. Forward, forward on all fronts!
Going to Newmains has been really good for me. It's been difficult. Thursday is like going on a hospital visit that lasts all day and ends around ten at night. The Dalai Lama says you've got to do stuff to help people and not just wish to help them. Talks cheap. But I couldn't do it if I couldn't meditate.
I did fifty of Mr Iyengar's yogic jumpings, forty prostrations and about five minutes of very intensive shadow boxing this evening. I am getting a wee bit fitter and I seem to be losing some weight. Hurrah!
2 comments:
I could probably manage about half a minute of shadow boxing before collapsing or getting injured. But there's varieties of fitness, and I can walk 15 miles in hot weather.
Approaching Newmains time as a retreat is a good idea. Maybe one day everything can be like a retreat. I imagine that's what advanced blissheids do.
Albert? You're right about fitness. My shadow boxing and running haven't been both good at the one time for ages! Unfortunately, the settlement of Wed, Thurs, and home on Friday late afternoon is not settled!! Hotboy
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